Module 6: Middle Adulthood

As I reflect on the lessons from this module, I realize that many of the decisions that I am making now, at age 29, will most likely be major factors in my future happiness during middle adulthood.  It is my hope that the manner in which I am choosing to live now, will have a positive impact in my future.  Life, however, tends to throw the proverbial curveball for which one is unable to prepare and those are the aspects of middle adulthood that concern me the most.

My main concern about middle-adulthood in the reality of the inevitable losses I will endure, namely in family.  As I age, my parents, family, and friends will as well, and my fears center around losing those that are closest to me.  It is important now, to foster and maintain strong bonds with my family and friends so as to enjoy every moment that we are all healthy and together.  Another concern about middle adulthood is the degradation of health, as chronic illness begins to rise during this time (Hutchinson, 2011).  I am concerned that as I age, chronic illness may take over my life and inhibit me from living fully, or taking care of others that need my help.  Additionally, financial security is important to me for the future.  Financial security equals self-reliance, and affords the opportunity and ability to provide for the next generation, or even previous generations who may need financial assistance. 

There are many aspects of middle adulthood that are concerning, but I choose not to live in fear.  Rather, I choose to be proactive and establish patterns and routines now that will serve me in the future.  When I began teaching at the tender age of 22, my mentor told me that I had to establish a 403B as soon as I signed my first paycheck.  His words were, “Take fifty dollars out of every paycheck you ever get.  You’ll never miss it and you will be thankful in thirty years.” (E. Orzulak, personal communication, 2005). The establishment of a retirement fund is one proactive and responsible step that I am taking now, to prepare for middle-adulthood.  In addition, it is important for me to establish a solid, healthy partnership with my boyfriend as we look towards marriage.  Romance and intimacy of course play an important role in any partnership, but I feel that financial security and solid communication play a more important role.  VanLaningham, Johnson, & Amato found that there was a general decline in marital happiness into middle adulthood, possibly due to the multiple roles aging couples must take on (as cited in Hutchinson, 2011, p.337).   My choice of long-term partners now, can and will affect my life later and therefore it is important for me to choose not only a loving man, but a responsible, communicative man as well.

As I move through my twenties and into my thirties I can feel internal shifts occurring in my life that will ultimately influence my pathway through middle adulthood.  Right now, I am working to cut the umbilical cord from my parents and their beliefs and truly realize what I value, spiritually.  Wink & Dillon see “spiritual growth as a positive outcome of a maturation process.” (as cited in Hutchinson, 2011, p.333).  As I mature spiritually, I hope to establish a clearer sense of self; a self that will be balanced and prepared to take on the curveballs that life will certainly throw.  To thwart the curveballs that I have some control over I have become aware of certain bad habits that will not serve my future and have taken the responsibility for dealing with issues now, in order to sustain maximum holistic health for my future.  I am consciously moving through my life right now, being present for, and cognizant of the decisions that I make and how they will affect my future.  Middle adulthood seems far away to me, but if the first thirty years moved as fast as they did, surely the next thirty will too.

Reference:

Hutchinson E. D. (2011). Dimensions of Human Behavior. The Changing Life Course (CLC) (4^th ed.) Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage